Anonymous asked: You mentioned you have a higher sex drive than your boyfriend and how he doesn't always want to have sex with you. Does that ever make you feel inadequate or ugly? Like something might be wrong with you? My husband and I have the same issues, except it makes me feel like shit.

Well, to be honest when I first started to notice my higher sex drive (after a few months of being intimate) I was really concerned. He sometimes rejected my advances, told me he wasn’t in the mood (lol) and even had sometimes said we had sex too much. All I could help but think was, “I’m not doing a good job,” “He isn’t satisfied,” and “Why won’t he just sleep with me?” Plus I had everyone telling me that it isn’t normal for a guy not to want to have sex. I had some saying he was cheating, others saying I wasn’t doing it for him and some saying he must prefer his hand. Basically everyone I talked to agreed that the guys are suppose to be the horny ones and us girls are suppose to be the ones turning them down.

But you know what? Fuck what they say. Because they aren’t always right. I have now come to realize that is a horrible stereotype, and not all guys are sex crazed fiends, and it is perfectly okay for a woman to want it as much, if not more than a man. Guys. Don’t. Only. Want. Sex. The real good guys, aren’t that shallow.

Anyway, I felt like that for awhile until finally I just confronted him about it, and asked why he didn’t want to have sex that often. I explained how I have been feeling not good enough and yada yada yada. He told me “You are beautiful, and absolutely rock my world in bed, but I care about you as a person, I love and respect you. I want to spend time with you and enjoy your company doing other things besides just always having sex. It isn’t the most important thing to me. I love just being around you.”

And you know what? I believe him. Now a days we tease each other about it, and sometimes I’ll pout when he isn’t in the mood. I see nothing wrong with being the hornier person in the relationship, because he can never say I don’t want to (;

So I suggest just bringing up to your husband how you feel, tell him how you do have needs, maybe find out what he would like more and less of.

But definitely do not feel like it is your fault! Just because he isn’t trying to get at you 24/7 doesn’t mean you are doing a bad job, or are ugly. He married you and made the commitment to spend his life with you, I can positively say that he thinks you are beautiful and wonderful. 

Overall, don’t stress so much, everyone has different levels of hormones, and everyone wants different things. Don’t let the “norms” dictate your life or how you feel about yourself.

Good luck! I hope everything works out (: <3